Planning a wedding can be a fun and exciting time, but can also be a source of stress. Managing stress is crucial to keep the happy in your happily ever after. So what are the main causes of wedding planning stress and how can you reduce them?
Expectations vs. Reality. Brides and grooms are bombarded with the idea of the “perfect” wedding day and often compare theirs to the budget-free nuptials of celebrity weddings. In reality, there is never a “perfect” wedding day. You can reduce the stress of wedding planning by listing what is most important to you for your wedding and focus your attention there. If it’s not on your list, you can breathe a little easier at letting the small stuff go.
Becoming uber-focused. Your engagement should be a happy time as you plan your futures together. If you spend too much time worrying about budgets, flower arrangements and wedding details, you might forget to spend time focused on your relationship. Remember to take the time to be present in each other’s lives.
Finances. Unless you are fortunate enough to have celebrity income, wedding budgets can often be a sore spot. Disagreements about wedding expenditures, family contributions and the budget in general can impact your relationships with each other and your families. This is where your expectations versus the reality can get you into trouble. Open conversation with anyone contributing to the wedding costs, and what that contribution entitles them to is very important. Look for budget friendly options for your wedding day based upon the things that are most important to you as a couple.
Family members. In many cases, your parents have had ideas on what your wedding day would be like since you were a young child. The pressure to live up to those ideas can be strong. This is when you need to rely on your partner to help you negotiate this potential minefield. You are planning for your life together. Make sure you present yourselves as a united front. Don’t undermine each other by agreeing to things that you know the other many not want.
Bridal party. Simple things like dress and tux fittings to larger events like the bachelor party can be moments of contention between you and your bridal party. It is important to remember that your bridal party is making a significant contribution to your wedding party. Make sure you communicate your wishes and the importance of their roles within your wedding.
Social (media) pressure. Pinterest and Facebook can help you get inspired and keep in touch with family, friends and even wedding vendors. But it can also bring on a whole new level of stress as you compare your wedding day to someone else’s (or a controlled photo shoot). It’s important to remember that you are planning the perfect wedding for you, not Pinterest.
Not having a contingency plan. Things will go awry as you plan your wedding. You’ll forget to include items in your wedding budget plan (click here for hidden wedding expenses), you’ll change your mind and need to purchase a different something, the weather will be too hot/cold/wet…the list goes on and on. But so can your contingency plan. You can take comfort in knowing you’ve kept some budget on reserve, planned for inclement weather and are working with pros who also have backup plans.
Some simple ways to reduce the stress of wedding planning:
- Stay healthy. Make sure you start or continue to practice healthy habits like a balanced diet, exercise routine and plenty of rest.
- Find a non-wedding activity you enjoy like yoga, gardening or reading to keep stress at bay.
- Admit when you are overwhelmed and ask for the help you need. Delegate tasks that you don’t feel the need to micromanage.
- Remember that you have a partner in the wedding planning. Your fiance should be involved in the process.
- Keep a realistic vision of your wedding day. It may not be “perfect”, but you are marrying the perfect person for you.
- Hire professionals to work with you. They are experts at what they do and can help you through the planning process.
- Make a planning schedule to stay on track.
- Make detailed planning lists that allow you to feel a sense of accomplishment when you finish a task.
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